Igor or Ivan or maybe Vlad
There was this guy who lived here one summer, never met him, but I saw this beast of a bear down on the beach once or twice a week for about four months. First, he had to be Siberian, he was about as hairy as it gets and had no self-awareness that follicular grooming exists. This guy was matted to withstand everything arctic.
Then, another tell… there was his man-kini swimming suit. Which made him out to be Eastern European for sure.
Every day, he’d gather all this beach grass, and after a month or so he’d built this massive tike thing in front of the house where he was staying. It was actually very cool. He never had anyone on the beach with him to help or to talk to or anything, even though the rental home could probably house dozens. Just him, his project, and no desire to meet others or talk to anyone or adapt to western beach ways.
Then one day he was gone. Never returned.
The logical answer, of course, is he was some kind of Russian exile who was in protective custody. Like a spy working for the US that they had to stash somewhere for a while. The beach here was a perfect place to make him disappear. But his handler from the CIA or FBI or whoever should have given him a surfboard prop. And some board shorts. And told him it was safe in the water. The guy never once went in the water or anywhere near the water. You could tell because no tracks ever went from the tike area to the surf. That sand stayed as clean as virgin snow. Like he had to stay close to a phone or firearm or bailout bag or something.
Four months on a beach, all alone, hiding up in the tall grass by the dune. Told ya it gets strange down here.
