The Osprey, the Snake and the Surf Buddy

Reprinted with permission of LeCarta.com, a map and surf story project developed by Surf Science Institute of Earth.

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Limpy McGeezer, 5,000 Runs Down The Beach, The chapter about snakes and birds and uncharacteristically choosing to do the right thing…

Most mornings I spot my neighbor Dave doing the same thing every aging surf-rat does: staring at the ocean pretending it’s talking back. He’s sixty years deep in the game, never crashes, owns every board known to humankind, and—most importantly—has never bent the knee to SUP. The heretic’s paddle remains untouched. Respect.

One day he and I are the only two clowns out in the lineup. Pelicans glide by so close you could high-five them, dolphins swirl underneath like they own the place, and the whole barrier island does its usual routine of proving it’s basically a reptile-infested sponge someone stapled houses onto. Snakes everywhere. Blacks, corns, copperheads, cottonmouths—the latter being God’s reminder that He occasionally makes things out of spite.

But the real star of this place is the osprey. Apex angler. Winged psychopath. Majestic as hell.

So Dave’s out a little further, parked like a buoy made of cartilage and neoprene, and I notice an osprey flapping down the beach with… a *huge snake* dangling from its talons. The thing’s still alive, twisting, pissed, triangular head and thick body—looked uncomfortably cottonmouth-ish.

Before I can process any of that, a second osprey dive-bombs in like it’s trying to steal the serpent. Full aerial battle. Two giant birds clawing, snapping, spiraling over our heads—dragging the first one farther and farther offshore, like a bully pushing a kid out into deeper water.

And then the snake drops.

Hundreds of yards out at sea.

Gone.

The birds keep fighting. The snake? A sinking question mark.

Now I’m sitting there thinking: snakes swim. Snakes *can* find things. Snakes *want* dry land. And what, exactly, is the first “dry land” visible from the middle of the ocean?

Dave’s longboard. Big, flat, welcoming. Like a Motel 6 for venomous wildlife.

Could I let that play out? Sure. The 12-year-old version of me from Idaho thinks that would be comedy gold.

But I’m not that guy anymore.

I paddled over, told Dave to keep his eyes peeled.

We never saw the snake again.

Osprey are cool birds.

Source: https://lecarta.com/surfspot/the-osprey-the-snake-and-the-surf-buddy/